Max was (a bit of) a surprise baby #3. We found out we were expecting a third baby at the end of January 2014. I was surprised yet not really that surprised. I started to feel funny about 1 week before finding out and after getting nauseous while eating lunch one day, tested that afternoon. Andrew came home that night and I had made a card that said: Congrats!!-Love, Baby Scott #3. Andrew was beaming with excitement. I remember sinking into reality with him that night that we would have 3 children under 5. We needed to finish our basement asap for extra space, I would be staying home again this fall, so many things to do in a short 9 months. I was filled with love and a bit of intimidation as I thought about how I would be able to handle it all. I quickly began to settle into the pregnancy and knew this (bit of a) surprise baby was meant to be and everything would work out just fine.
I had a relatively normal (for me) 1st trimester that included vomiting all day everyday and extreme exhaustion. I would easily be in bed at 8:30 pm, up by 7 am and ready for a nap again at 10:30 am. When we first told Jack mommy was having another baby he exclaimed that we were having 2 girls. I was slightly concerned he would be right with the way I was feeling. I went to my initial prenatal appointment at 11 weeks, heard (and saw!) 1 baby and remember looking at the ultrasound and thinking immediately it was another boy. My eyes welled up with tears as my excitement for another squishy baby was becoming more real.
Fast forward some more, I left my position at the CAP agency and took a temporary but better paying position at Lifetime. I was really torn about my decision but felt that the opportunity to make some better money before the baby arrived was important. I settled into my new position, really liked the team and was excited that my position would be ending at the end of August, giving me at least 6 weeks at home with my boys before Max's arrival. Life continued as normal. I had my 16 week check up, recorded Max's strong heartbeat on my phone and set the date for my 20 week anatomy scan, May 23rd, 2014.
The days approaching May 23rd were met with a lot of name and gender debate between Andrew and I. We wanted to have a name picked out for either gender before we were told what the baby was. Andrew thought girl, I thought boy. We easily had a girl name chosen but struggled with our 3rd boy name. One day it suddenly came to me, "Max" or Maxwell just in case he wanted to sound mature and professional at some point. Also, I believed it was the perfect littlest brother name. When I asked Andrew we both agreed it was indeed perfect.
The morning of May 23rd, 2014 started like any day. My ultrasound wasn't until 2:30 pm so I went to work and left with Andrew for an early lunch and a swing through Buy Buy Baby before our ultrasound. Things went downhill from there. We were called about 30 minutes prior to our appointment and told that our OB was taken into an emergency situation at the hospital and we needed to reschedule our ultrasound. After some phone calls back and forth we had an appointment that day instead with the sonographer at 4:30pm. We went into the ultrasound and the sonographer started to ask me over and over about our due date and if we were positive we were 20 weeks along. Being a 3rd time mom, I knew something was up. I also noticed that Max's arm's and leg's looked so chubby, like extra folds of skin. I also noticed that one side of his head jutted out a bit and looked irregular shaped. The sonographer became more and more concerned about things as time went on. She only mentioned however that the baby's femurs and humorus looked "short and bowed". Finally after over an hour we were told it was another boy. I tried to be happy and even remember laughing a bit but I was still SO worried something wasn't right. She asked us to stay and speak with the on call OB about her findings but by 6:30 pm no one had been able to come over and we were mentally and physically exhausted. We elected to leave and have our OB call us instead.
I remember getting in the car and breaking down into tears, knowing something wasn't right. Andrew calmed me down and after talking with my doula, Katie and our family, we felt that we still needed to be positive. Even my OB called me that evening to reassure me that this could really be "nothing".
In my mind, Max was moving, his heart-rate was strong and if it was life-threatening we would have surely been sent to Labor and Delivery. I kept looking at my ultrasound pictures with so much love and hope that our 3rd little boy would be okay. We were urged to make an appointment with a perinatal group to follow up on the findings and make sure everything was okay. Our level 2 ultrasound was scheduled for May 30, 2014.
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